1.2.1.8 Mirror, mirror on the wall

I once bought a beautiful silk tie for $190. When I told a friend how much it had cost me, he was absolutely shocked that I would spend so much on a tie. But to me, that tie was not an extravagant purchase.

In my role as a public speaker I want to look good and feel good about myself. I cannot stand in front of people and challenge them to develop the mindset of a millionaire if I’m not practicing what I preach. I dress according to the image that I want to project. I dress according to what I think I am worth. I perceive value in myself. Rather than thinking, That’s too much to pay for a tie! I prefer to think, I deserve to wear a tie like that! I’m worth it! When you think about it, silk is really just expensive worm puke. And I’m not good enough to wear it?! You see, it’s not about being conceited or arrogant or narcissistic, it’s about valuing yourself and developing freer attitudes about money, wealth and prosperity.

You’ve heard of the fairytale Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs. In that classic tale the vain Queen asks her magic mirror, “Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the fairest of them all?” And each time the mirror answers, “You are the fairest one of all.” I hold to the belief that it is impossible to avoid the outer manifestation of your inner view of yourself. In other words, you will live out how you see yourself. Your net worth is linked to your self worth.

A critical factor in developing a millionaire mindset is to develop a healthy view of yourself. How do you see yourself? Do you see yourself as a person who deserves to prosper? Do you see yourself as a person who has the potential and the ability to become prosperous? Or do you feel ‘unworthy’ of prosperity? Perhaps you think that prosperity is beyond you, that you ‘don’t have what it takes’. Sterling W. Sill said this: “Wealth is not only what you have, but it is also what you are.”

The reason many people don’t prosper is not because of their lack of ability or their circumstances, but rather because of who they are, or more precisely, who they think or feel they are and how they see themselves. The level of prosperity in your life will be determined to a large extent by who you are as a person.

To be prosperous, you need to have a clear picture of the person you believe you can be. You will naturally gravitate towards the dominant image of yourself in your mind. If thoughts of anxiety are your dominant mindset, then you’ll gravitate towards anxiety. It’s like trying to hit a dartboard with a dart when you’re facing another direction. To hit a target you must be facing the direction of the target and focusing on the target.

Many people get into a rut in their thinking. When they think about themselves, they don’t believe they deserve to prosper. They think that increase will never happen. Remember, the only difference between a rut and a grave is time! Don’t die with prosperity still in you! You need to learn to think like this: Who deserves nice things? You do! Who deserves a prosperous family? You do! Who deserves a nice home? You do! Who deserves to wear nice clothes? You do! Who deserves to have a life that is advancing with wealth and increase? You do! You deserve these things! The biggest hindrance to prosperity is not a lack of money, it’s a wrong mindset. Change how you see yourself and others. Your life will not be able to advance until your mind is set to advance. Your view of wealth is wealth’s view of you.

When you look at yourself, what do you see? What images of you dominate your life? Whatever images you have of yourself are what you will actually gravitate towards—they become self-fulfilling prophecies. You cannot have two competing thoughts at the same time—one thought will always dominate. If you are thinking you’d love to be more prosperous but your dominant mentality about yourself is “I’m not worth much”, then you will never be prosperous.

You can’t have two thoughts in one head

If you are reading this book and thinking, I really would like to be prosperous, but I don’t believe I have the effort, energy and focus needed to become a prosperous person, then you have two competing thoughts in your mind and at some point one of them will overcome the other. If on the one hand you desire prosperity, and yet on the other hand your mindset is one of lack (not enough, not good enough, not doing enough), then this negative mindset will dominate your self-image. Until you begin to see yourself as a person who has the capacity to be prosperous, prosperity will continue to elude you.

Perspective is so important to prosperity. The way we respond to life’s many challenges forms imprints in our minds called perspectives. Life impacts us all in so many different ways that each of us has developed our own unique perspectives. For example, when you stand on top of a mountain, the direction you face determines your perspective. Where you stand determines what you see. When you face north, you get a northern perspective. When you face south, you get a southern perspective. We see many different perspectives even on the same mountain.

I’ve known people who have been involved in identical businesses, and yet one has succeeded while the other one has failed! The bottom line is this: The underlying difference is their perspective.

The way we respond to life’s many challenges forms imprints in our minds called perspectives.

Set yourself free

Have you ever given yourself permission to prosper? To feel good about feeling good—to feel good about yourself—you should try walking around with a sign saying, “Pardon me, I’m prospering!” Tragically, some people are so good to others, but very bad towards themselves. Eventually, that won’t last.

How do you see yourself? Until you learn to value yourself properly, you will not be able to develop a millionaire mindset. Why? Because you will lack the motivation needed to pursue a life of true prosperity. “But. . .” I hear you ask, “Isn’t it really more important to value other people? Shouldn’t my motivation to be wealthy stem from a desire to help others?” Yes, but it’s not possible to value other people any more than you value yourself. One of the great principles of the Christian faith is the requirement to love your neighbor as yourself. This implies that you can only love your neighbor if you first love yourself. How in the world can you ever love someone else if you don’t love yourself! A millionaire mindset places a high value on self, and then turns that outward by placing equally high value on other people.

To illustrate, let me tell you a bit about myself. When I was a child, my family didn’t have much. I wanted desperately to earn some money. So at the age of 10 I went and got my first job. Now, the Sydney suburb of Bankstown was not the greatest thriving metropolis in the world. In fact, it was one of the worst suburbs in Sydney at that time. It’s a very multicultural area of Sydney. Back then it experienced a lot of economic problems, but it was a community to which a lot of Lebanese, Greeks and Italians migrated. My own family migrated there from Italy. In fact, at school we used to play a game called ‘Spot the Aussie’.

I got my first job at a fruit and vegetable market in Bankstown. I remember I used to earn 40 cents an hour packing potatoes into plastic bags. I became so good at packing potatoes that I was soon promoted to packing onions as well. You see, I discovered that I could do two things at once—unlike most men!

The two greatest motivators are recognition and reward

Across the road was another fruit and vegetable shop owned by an Italian man by the name of Peter. Peter had heard of my skills as a potato packer and then as an onion packer. My fame had spread throughout the Bankstown fruit market community. There I was, the potato packer champion of Bankstown. (I may be short, but I’ve got very fast hands!) Peter began to ‘headhunt’ me. Instead of offering me 40 cents an hour, he told me he would give me 10 cents a bag. I immediately realized that my value was increasing. My perspective began to change. I began to see myself as the fastest potato packer in Bankstown because I was now paid by the bag, not by the hour. My perspective changed as my productivity increased. Reward is a great motivator. My productivity increased because my value increased.

Some years later, as a high school student I wanted to buy a guitar, so my dad got me a job at Victa Lawn Mowers. I worked on the assembly line and I was paid about $3 to $4 an hour. Years later I took on a position working with youth in a local church. I was paid the huge sum of $140 a week! I realized that I would have to supplement my income, so I went back to the fruit market—this time it was the Flemington Fruit Market. I didn’t realize how much the fame of my childhood exploits had spread throughout the fruit market community in Sydney, but when I walked in on the first day of my job people stared at me in absolute awe. They began to say, “It’s him! He’s no taller than he was, but he looks older!” They asked me, “Is it you?”

“Yes, it is me,” I replied. “It is Pat Mesiti, the fastest potato packer in Bankstown!”

So I went to work every day, starting at 4 o’clock in the morning and working until 10am to supplement my income. Now, fast forward to 2005. I recently flew to Europe to speak and I was paid $10,000 an hour. What’s changed? I’m the same person, same height, same name, and same looks. What has changed is my value to the market place.

The other week I was offered a huge sum of money to do some work for a company. My first reaction was: Why would they call me? Then it dawned on me—of course they would call me! Who else would they call? You see, it’s the value I bring to people and to organizations that quantifies what I earn.

Net worth is related to self worth

Your net worth is directly related to your self worth. If you work on your self, your value will grow. Many people think they are paid for their time, but they’re not—they’re paid for their value.

People have tried to stick a mind virus in me, telling me, “You can’t make that much money! You’re just a Bankstown boy! You’ll always be a Bankstown boy. You can take the boy out of Bankstown, but you can’t take Bankstown out of the boy.” Well, I really believe you can. You can change if you choose to. It really starts with your mindset and you’ve got to start today.

CHALLENGE: Realize your true worth

Ask yourself this question: “Do I really value myself?” What value do you place on your mind and your knowledge? Do you baulk at the cost of attending a seminar that might help you improve your mind? If you truly value yourself, you won’t think twice about spending money on self-improvement. A negative mindset will say, “That’s a luxury I can’t justify!” A positive and healthy mindset will say, “I am worth it!”

To develop a millionaire mindset, you need to see yourself in a new light. If you’ve always thought of yourself as a pauper, start seeing yourself as a prince. If you don’t value yourself as much as you should, then start to speak differently about yourself and act differently towards yourself. Go and buy yourself a nice tie or a new dress. Tell yourself that you deserve it, that you are worth it.